If you add a select few people who pop in from time to time one would say, 'well he certainly has a group of people around him, he doesn't fall into the category lonely elderly'. And on the surface you may be right. But in reality this man is as lonely as if he was alone on the planet.
His nature, his manner, his look on life has not made him loved amongst those who know him. It pains me, thinking about him alone in that house. Despite the 'pop ins' this man is alone. And I know it and all those that pop in know it! To get a bit of a picture- think how Scrooge is portrayed. Not a pretty picture is it? And I am SO struggling with this. I find it hard to feel compassion- yet I do feel a sense of sadness.
When I did visit with an elderly neighbour, all we got for a full 15 minutes was - " well about time you came to see me. I thought more of you" - etc etc! I almost got up and left. He had been housebound for all of 3 days at that point.
Those around him were surprised he saw the dawn of 2014. We never thought he would 'last' this long. Someone even uttered that ' he is even too mean to die'. I am ashamed, saddened and upset.
"What do you mean, things aren't going well?" I asked my husband. "Well, he fell twice this morning, he can't hardly walk anymore, he can't keep his food down, even sitting hurts, he has severely bruised his ribs so breathing hurts. I was a bit hard on him and told him that it was really time he thought about going into care- maybe a hospice. The situation can't go on like this. I even told him it wasn't fair to those few who tried to make life a little easier for him. Those that do come aren't capable of the kind of care you need Wim".
My heart ached for this man- I think he is scared- not to mean to die but scared of letting go of life. He isn't a believer- when he dies - everything stops, it is all over. How sad- how totally and miserably sad. Please pray for Wim.