Wednesday, 13 June 2012

Mid week-Wednesday

For some Hump Day, for others mid week. For us, fish day. Father-in-law arrives every Wednesday round 12:30 and joins us for lunch. A fishy lunch. He has been doing that for years and we just hope he can continue to do so. Otherwise we will just take the fish to him!

We noticed recently that my father-in-law isn't quite his sprightly self. His energy level has dropped dramatically though he wants to give the impression there is nothing wrong. We expect much from our children when they are young. To pick up all this information, to become more independent, to " grow up" with the result we chase them through childhood into adulthood.

Now, the roles are reversed. We take care of pa with things that are now beyond him. We want to
" take the sting" out of his daily doings. I notice we pop in more often. Last week when he showed signs of stress and fatigue I unpacked and stored his shopping. We have explained repeatedly how his car locking system works. Just push the button twice pa, then all the doors are unlocked. Yes, the one with the open lock pictogram. No, that one locks the car. No to lock you don't have to push the button twice, once locks everything. Poor man. Must be so confusing to have gone from a key central locking system to a ' just push the button' system. Still we understand the confusion and are patient with him while he learns new tricks.

Yet on the home front, he has a computer. Just so he can listen to organ music and look at a couple of hobby youtube films. Arie, my brother in law has taught him how to use the computer, and how to 'click' on his films and shut them off. He has a list with steps and loves it when it works. He does have a great back up system if it doesn't work. "I just switch it off and watch tv".

Pa, a lovely soft hearted man, becoming more and more aware of his fragility, his humanness. He himself is aware he is becoming frailer and more vulnerable. Tries to hide it, but it is already obvious to us. At 84, he still drives ( for now) cooks for two as my brother-in-law who is single, eats with dad every day, does his own shopping and because he is mobile doesn't 'sit around'. He enjoys reasonable health, has home help for 3 hours a week and has a sunny disposition.

We enjoy going places and sharing time with him while we can.

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